What are we to do in these situations? The second reading describes very plainly that very often what seems to be negative and hurtful experiences are in fact moments of growth for us. What seems to be tragedies are in fact opportunities for us to become powerful sources of blessings to those around us. The invitation is to persevere in our difficult moments knowing that our God is close to us with healing and encouragement.
This is the story of each of us. If we look at what happened to Jesus we can also understand how to act when we are faced with difficult situations. The life of Jesus had overall a very positive start. He had a great mother and a very loving and caring foster father. His ministry was blessed with so many miracles and great crowds followed him. He built up a strong reputation and people marvelled at what he did and said. People were even prepared to follow him for days on end without feeling the necessity of going to their homes to continue their normal daily life. They were mesmerized by him. However, during his time of ministry, Jesus also experienced opposition. People started to gossip about him. Some tried to put him on the spot through awkward questions whilst others criticized him severely and openly for his teaching and ways of acting. Things got so bad that the chief priests and religious elders plotted to kill him as a criminal. Yet in spite of all this, Jesus persevered, because He was very conscious of what His mission entailed and because of His close relationship and prayer life with God the Father. The key word is perseverance.
Two years ago I got quite sick and spent two months in hospital. It was a particularly difficult time for various reasons. Sickness made me feel very insecure and desiring to find a reason or a solution for what was happening to me. And yet, I could not find a reason for what was happening to me. I felt disempowered and very impoverished as I felt that gradually I was losing control of my own life. I got upset and distressed because all of a sudden I was prevented from going on with my life in the manner that I was used to. I was confined to a hospital room full of uncertainty and waiting for some sort of a light at the end of the tunnel. It was at this very moment when I felt so isolated and unsure of where I was that I hung on to my faith and to my relationship with Jesus Christ. I remember praying constantly. “Lord Jesus, take my hand and guide me through this uncertain period of my life. I trust you and I decide once again for you”.
This time of seclusion was a very sobering time and a time for serious reflection on the kind of life that I have been living. It was also a very grace filled experience because gradually as I continued to reflect on what was happening to me I started to learn very basic lessons. I was being presented with an opportunity to take a serious look at my own life and to make the necessary decisions in order to continue with my living in a life giving and meaningful manner. I learnt three very basic lessons. First, I learnt that every day is a gift from God. Therefore, I made a decision to live every day to the full being a source of blessing and life to all those who I meet. I learnt never to take life or each day of my life for granted. Secondly, I discovered that I worry about too many things that I should not worry about. I learnt that my way of living was geared very much towards controlling every facet of what I do. This did not leave me with the necessary freedom for learning and for being open to be surprised by God. I was spending so much energy trying to exercise my ministry as if everything depended on me.
In the third place, I learnt that what ultimately matters in life is my personal relationship with Jesus Christ. With all my talents and gifts, and with all the studies that I have done, I was not able to do anything to alleviate my situation except to totally confide in my God. “Lord Jesus you know what is best for me and I know that you will guide me to what is best for me because you desire the greatest good for me”. It is only when I made this act of abandonment that a certain peace descended in my heart. This kept me persevering throughout this time of anxiety and distress. My sickness, at the end, instead of being a moment of tragedy was in reality a time of grace and I am a much better person because of that experience.
Moments of difficulties can never be life giving if we try to pretend that they are not happening. There is a real temptation to hide things under the carpet and to reason that things will soon pass and I will be all right if I can ignore what is going on. I will try to cope with what is happening by having a good time, by drinking a bit more to get my mind off these things or by seeking places where I can get a bit high. We may try to do this, but experience has shown that these difficulties when not faced will keep following us like a shadow until we get desperate enough to face and tackle them, but not on our own.
The other temptation is that in order to find quick solution for what is happening to us, we make very hasty decisions that eventually will make the situation more difficult to handle or to cope with.
St Ignatius of Layola, the founder of the Jesuits used to say never make a decision either when you are on a high or when you are feeling very distressed or when you are in a panic state. Decisions ought to be made after serious reflection, having the opportunity to examine calmly every facet of the situation with good and sold guidance and in a spirit of prayer. Wise words indeed.
Fr Michael Casey, a monk at Tarrawassa Abbey in Victoria has this to say. “In moments of difficulties and anxiety, change nothing. Let the issues keep coming to the surface. Do not frighten them away, have a good look at them and see if something can be done to integrate them. We cultivate a serenity of heart which means effectively reducing our trust in our own efforts and increasing our confidence in the goodness of God”.
God Bless.
